Blog

April 11, 2021

Are You the Only One Who Does Not Know?

Are you the only one who does not know? Dear Brothers and Sisters, in our time…The concealment of God is part of contemporary man’s spirituality, in an existential almost subconscious manner, like a void in the heart that has continued to grow larger and larger. Pope Benedict Just so, the road to Emmaus, the Gospel reading for Wednesday, April 7th, in the Christian liturgy serves as metaphor for humanity. Whether believers or not; consciously or unconsciously, all seven billion of us walk beside the God-man and ask Him, “Are you the only one who does not know about what they […]
April 4, 2021

The Irresistible Essence of Divinity

The irresistible essence of divinity We all feel it: The magnetic, magnificence of Beauty. Whether in sunsets, ocean surfs, newborn infants or soaring orchestral chorus, our hearts soar, are lifted up in what feels like an echo of something so yearned for that we cannot express it. During the many years I considered myself an atheist, agnostic or another label that felt fitting, a sunrise or operatic aria could drop me to my knees figuatively or literally. I feel confident that even those most immersed in our woke culture are goaded by the irresistible essence of divinity. Now that we […]
March 28, 2021

Praying The Old Testament: Mirror For You and Me

Praying The Old Testament: Mirror for you and me. “Catholics pray the Old Testament? Really?” The speaker was a Jewish friend. Agrressively atheist, yet intrigued by my love for her people. Judith was just the first of many Jews and Christian friends who have asked me that question with incredulity. “I have always been attracted to the Jewish people…the Jewish religion.” Elizabeth, another Jewish atheist we met on a cruise, was surprised- even uncomfortable, at my words. Even more so when I added, “You are God’s chosen people.” Why do I feel this way? There are many reasons. Growing up, […]
March 21, 2021

Have We Got it Wrong: Heaven on Earth?

Have we got it wrong: Heaven on Earth? Is heaven a place far away? Only habitable by the dead? Or could it be attainable here? On earth…in this life? Many, perhaps a majority, of us look at our life on earth as something to be endured. Perhaps a cosmic test of some kind. Increasing numbers of us accept reincarnation and its karmic payback. We Christians may not all that different in our thinking. Many of us act as if suffering is what life is…what life should be. We seem determined to wrest misery out of the jaws of joy. Overstatement? […]
March 14, 2021

Fasting: Why Do It?

Fasting: Why do it? We are body, spirit, and soul, we humans. For many of us, however, any concept of our spirit or soul is either whimsy or irrelevant. In this postchristian culture, we have confidence only in our bodies. Spirit and soul have been eclipsed by the pure physicality of our material forms. To some of the most physical of us, the athletes, fasting became a way of life in the late nineties and spread. Over time, it has caught on. The health benefits of fasting from all food for eight, sixteen hours, or two to three days comprise […]
March 7, 2021

The Institutionalization of Denial: Legacy of the Social Sciences

The institutionalization of Denial: Legacy of the Social Sciences You know them when you meet them. Or read them. Or have the privilege to study under them. Those rare people gifted with the courage to perceive their limitations; even trumpet their errors. Edwin H Freidman was such a man. Although you may be tempted to read politics into this piece, do not do so. For there is wisdom contained here, if it is reduced to politics, it disappears. Edwin Friedman was an ordained Rabbi, psychoanalyst and family therapist, and a leadership consultant in Washington, DC. He founded the Bethesda Jewish […]
February 28, 2021

Shadow on age, patience, and death.

Shadow on age, patience and death. “The old boy’s not what he used to be.” Looking at the tall, thin, older, stranger watching our sidewalk trio: Seymour in front, pulling as hard as possible, me, and Shadow plodding at the end of his leash, I replied, “Neither am I.” Each day, the three of us walk through our closely packed community, and down to the sidewalk along route 1 in our still new residence of Oceano, California. At least twice each week, someone comments about Shadow’s age. Like the neighbor who has finally stopped asking, “How old is that dog […]
February 21, 2021

Cain and Abel: It’s All About Mediocrity

Cain and Abel: It’s all about mediocrity Monday’s reading for the Christian liturgy is a Genesis passage most Jews and Christians recall with ease. Abel’s dead, the Lord comes looking for him and asks Cain where Abel is. Cain’s reply? “Am I my brother’s keeper?” Remember the song, he ain’t heavy, he’s my brother? Even back in the days when I thought the Bible and religion pure fallacy, I loved that song. And sang it at the top of my lungs. A vivid demonstration, I think, of the law written in each of our hearts. Even-perhaps especially-when we deny its […]
February 14, 2021

Football as metaphor for life, faith, and happiness

Football as metaphor for life, faith and happiness Back in another career, my fourth, I ‘met’ Brady. Everything was brand new: The marriage, the career, the faith and football. It was January, 2002. My still new husband insisted I watch the Playoffs between his beloved team, the New England Patriots and Oakland. We were living in Connecticut, cold, snowy Connecticut. I’d decided to leave my career in academic medicine where I’d built a national reputation and join my husband in an online business about which I knew nothing. About sales. Or marketing. Or excel spreadsheets. John knew I didn’t like […]
February 7, 2021

Make Yourself an Ark: Listen to the Higher Voice

Listen to the higher voice: make yourself an Ark The Bishop’s encapsulated advice to the Cadets at the US Naval Academy in his address Called Into The Depths? Listen to the higher voice. Build an ark. Accept your mission. Find the place where Jesus sleeps. Bishop Robert Barron’s brilliant address to the Navy Cadets serves both as metaphor and method for the upcoming forty days known as the Great Fast by our Byzantine Catholic friends. In case you are not familiar with the auxiliary bishop for the Archdiocese of San Francisco, here are a few facts about this unusually gifted […]
January 31, 2021

The Corporate Reality of Prayer: How Can You Say Reality?

The Corporate Reality of Prayer Although I had never conceived of the Mystical Body of Christ, a few pieces of the massive chessboard of the mystery of God clicked into place. All at once. We were all connected, all of us. Even if the virtual arteries and connective tissue had narrowed, even closed, due to sin, they were there. They existed. All of those strangers speaking to me through the years, even perhaps praying for me. There was no doubt in my mind, none at all. This was why I had felt this powerful sense of belonging, of being home. […]
January 24, 2021

A Man For Our Times: Saul of Tarsus

A man for our times: Saul of Tarsus Tomorrow, the Christian Church celebrates the Conversion of St. Paul the Apostle, pictured above in Caravaggio’s exquisite painting. A special day in the life of the Christian Church. A special day for each one of us: believers or not. This day is one imbued with mystery and grace for me: a former hater of Paul, his writings, and the entire Church. The following section is excerpted from the author’s notes of my latest novel about the early life of St. Paul: Throughout the writing of this book, my decision to imagine the […]
January 17, 2021

The Razor’s Edge of Forgiveness

The razor’s edge of forgiveness “Forgive your enemies. “ Since forgiveness was just as unnatural 2100 years ago as it now, the Apostle Peter seeks to bind it. You will recall that Peter was a pious Jew and knew the Mosaic law. The law that from Levitcus, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” and in both Deuteronomy and Exodus denounced the hatred of fellow country men “in your heart,” and commanded the loving of “even the stranger.” And yet, Peter asked, “Lord, how many times must I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”  Jesus answered, “I […]
January 10, 2021

Baptism: His and Ours

Baptism: His and Ours If we’re under the age of fifty and are, or were, a Christian, we have been baptized. Most likely, our parents made the decision for us when we were infants. But in this “post-Christian era”, more and more parents choose not to baptize their child. The stated reasons vary, but these are a sample of those I have been told and read. We don’t need church to be spiritual. We can pray anywhere. The woods, mountain or ocean is our chapel. Nature is my church. I was brainwashed as Catholic or evangelical Christian and I want […]
January 3, 2021

In Desperate Need of Fatherhood

In desperate need of fatherhood Ours is a world in desperate need of fatherhood. A quick online search reveals the startling rise of single motherhood here in the US and in the world. Soberly revealing our need for heavenly intervention for our fatherless families and overburdened mothers. Starkly exposing our culture’s bereft notion of fatherhood as mere sexual congress. These very simple words, “father” and “fatherhood,” once had plain, unadulterated meanings. But that was before the intensification of the “struggle between the family and the State for the minds of the young.” And the realization that the final battle between […]
December 27, 2020

Happy Holidays or The Silence of Christmas?

Happy holidays or the silence of Christmas? They are synonymous, aren’t they? Don’t both phrases [Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas] mean the same thing? I used to think so. But now, I am not so sure. I never understood all of the animosity of some Christians to the first phrase because “happy holidays” is merely a shorthand way to say, “happy holy days..”even if intended to be ‘woke’, the underlying meaning remains. But this Christmas is different, as is so much else in our lives, in America, and this world. Like you, I often hear and read variations on “when […]
December 20, 2020

Hope Holders: Reflections on Mary

Hope holders: Reflections on Mary Do you wonder why these beliefs have taken root in your Soul? Roots which deepen, burrow into the secret places of mind and Heart? Year after year, prayer by prayer, tear by tear, doubt by doubt until Fixed? Do you wonder why you believe the impossible-god as infant born of a Virgin? Do you wonder at this girl child, at her trust in the incomprehensible Answer? Enveloped by wisdom, she carried eternity in her womb, A child emptied of ego, of self, of sin, full, instead, of grace. She who was filled with the hope […]
December 13, 2020

We Gotta Give This World Back to God

We gotta give this world back to God You gotta get down on your knees Believe, fold your hands, and beg and plead Keep on! praying You gotta cry, rain, tears of pain Pound the floor, and scream His name ‘Cause we’re still worth saving Can’t go on like this, and live like this We can’t love like this You can hope the best Make a wish The only answer is We give this world back to God Ohh, give it back … Reba Mcentire Back to God My friend Gordon Ashe posted this song on his Facebook newsfeed early […]
December 6, 2020

These Weeks Before Christmas: Advent

These weeks before Christmas In my new home of California, the churches are closed again. Therefore, we are not able to see the simple beauty of the Advent wreath, purple vestments and candles on the altar. But no mind, I found the box containing my Advent wreath and candles and they are now displayed- for these weeks before Christmas have become cherished ones. During my pre-conversion life, these weeks before Christmas were jam packed with parties, mostly work-related and therefore obligatory, along with shopping excursions to unearth novel gifts for people who did not need them. And planning vacation when […]
November 29, 2020

Writing Two Books at Once-A First

Writing Two Books at Once? If you scroll down to the middle of my home page for my new website, linwilder.com, you will quickly see that I am writing two books at once- a first for me. Each book is scheduled to be released next year. Certainly, I did not plan it this way. However, the antagonist-and even major parts of the plot for Plausible Liars have proved to be so elusive that it makes a strange kind of sense to take a break from all things transgender to return to a place that feels like home: The ancient world. […]
November 23, 2020

The Problem with the Catholic Church

The problem with the Catholic Church is the crucifix. That was the first sentence of an article published shortly after my conversion to Catholicism. That there could be meaning in suffering was a concept which both beckoned and baffled me. My career in academic medicine and doctoral studies had been aimed at preventing or at least mitigating suffering. Consequently the Catholic spotlight on the Cross, and St. Paul’s exhortations throughout Corinthians … …But we preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles fascinated and repelled, yet felt eerily logical. A lifelong writer, finding the search for […]
February 23, 2014

People You’d Like To Meet In Heaven

I think there was a book by this name- or close to it- published a few years back…or maybe it was a movie. Regardless, I think about that question now and then, perhaps we all do. When I read something that prompts me to consider this possibility ( CS Lewis is almost always my catalyst, more on why in a moment), I get stuck on a few details. Like these: Will I get there? If and when I do, will there be a recognizable I…? Will who I was while here, what I did and what I thought be accessible […]
May 26, 2019

CS Lewis The Great Divorce: A Rereading

John Chillingworth/Picture Post/Hulton Archive, via Getty Images CS Lewis- The Great Divorce: A Rereading …the bus was full oflight. It was cruel light. I shrank from the faces and forms by which I was surrounded. They wereall fixed faces, full not of possibilities but of impossibilities, some gaunt, some bloated, someglaring with idiotic ferocity, some drowned beyond recovery in dreams; but all, in one way oranother, distorted and faded. One had a feeling that they might fall to pieces at any moment if thelight grew much stronger. Then-there was a mirror on the end wall of the bus-I caught sight […]
July 28, 2019

CS Lewis and Karl Rahner

CS Lewis and Karl Rahner Most likely they never met. But the atheist turned Anglican Christian CS Lewis and the Roman Catholic Jesuit theologian Karl Rahner perceived their God in radically similar ways. Both men served as apologists for their faith causing more than a little consternation in the minds of more rule bound colleagues. “I think all Christians would agree with me if I said that though Christianity seems at the first to be all about morality, all about duties and rules and guilt and virtue, yet it leads you on, out of all that, into something beyond. One […]
September 22, 2019

The Contradictions Of Sin And Mercy

Contradictions of sin and mercy There are times when an essay from the past feels fitting. This is one of those times. Mostly because there is one man who better understands the contradictions of sin and mercy better than any other: Karol Wojtyla. His first published work was a series of meditations prepared at the request of the then Pope Paul VI for the 1976 Lenten Retreat of the Pope and his staff. The then Cardinal called his book, The Sign of Contradiction. I first wrote these words was in April of 2014. In some ways, that feels like a […]